Blog of Emelie Ivansson

On my Yester-year/2009 post, the post about goodbyes, my dear friend Bobby pointed out that we do need goodbyes in our life as well as Hello’s, otherwise it would be too crowded with people. This and the annual trip down memory lane (which happens every christmas, seeing old friends again) made me think. I want to believe that he’s wrong, that we can’t get enough people in our life. But after some reflections I do think that he’s right - We are meant to move on, meet new people and leave others behind, to evolve as persons, gain knowledge, grow and get the most out of live. Thinking you have what “you need” when it comes to your social life, might make you stop trying to meet new faces. This especially when you lived in the same place for a while, you stick to the same friends, the same part of town, do the same things, and obviously you miss out.

Last night I had a dream about an old friend that I haven’t seen in years. It made me feel a bit sad - How we all move on, without really looking back and without putting an effort into maintaining at least some kind of contact with people that at some point, was very important to us. Then, today, I got a very unexpected and sweet mail, by a friend from school, that I haven’t seen in about 5 years. And that says a lot, it’s not that hard, nor complicated. For some reason he got to think about me, and he sent me an email to let me know. It’s as simple as clicking the Send Button.

So my conclusion is; moving on, saying goodbye, is the most natural thing in life, and the word goodbye is invented for a reason, but at the end of the day, it really doesn’t hurt to sometime just write a line, and let your old and far away friends know that you actually haven’t forgotten all about them.

When I woke up the day after I for a second though the day before was all a dream, but it wasn’t. It was a surreal and totally crazy day. Unfortunately I can’t tell you all about it.. But my feelings is mine and I need to share them. Since I came here to San Francisco I’ve been feeling like home almost from day one, with my apartment, the city and most important, at work. I already got close friends here that means a lot to me and that I can talk about everything with, which feels great.

Yesterday I got to experience my fist emotional earthquake in SF. Last week I got to know that Mike, (my mentor and one of the guys that brought me to Attik) was going to quit. That was a chock and it sucks so bad. Will miss him, he’s a crazy wonderful weirdo(:P) and hell good at what he do, Wish I had more time to learn from him.. but nope, or, at least not right now.

As that wasn’t enough. Wait, just for the record, two guys brought me to Attik, Mike and Justin, and therefore I love them, of course, I’m so happy they did, and since they did bring me here they have become something special to me, they make me feel safe or something.. don’t know really…

Anyway yesterday I got to know that Justin is leaving too.. It felt like I lost my both legs or something! Unfortunately, the day wasn’t over with that..it was even more…After all, It was a very special day, and probably a huge learning and experience for me out in the real world.

So, In the end of the day, I Know I did lose hell of a lot that day, but I think I gained something too, things that have been said to me that day, Things that I will think about and that will help me work hard, kick as and keep doing my shit. And most important, made me realized I’m actually kinda good. Over and out